It’s going to be close to 50 degrees today, that’s a heat wave these days! Last night on the commute home I felt almost naked, then I realized, I wasn’t wearing a huge sweater and a huge jacket. It was a good feeling. However, when I got home my apartment felt like it was 100 degrees. That’s the down side of a radiator; the damn thing is always on.

I needed some new garbage bags about a week ago. So I went to the old A & P to see what the good folks at Glad had to offer. I found my Glad, drawstring kitchen bags and headed to the checkout. I get these bags home, open them up and lined my basket with one. I’m walking around and I starting smelling this odd smell of petroleum and stale perfume. It reeks; my apartment is starting to smell like a French whore. After some investigation, I discovered that the seemingly harmless bags I purchased include Glad’s newest innovation – Odor Sheild.

What the hell? Honestly, if I wanted a room deodorizer, the last people on the list would be the folks at Glad. What are they thinking over there? Is this progress?! If I wanted a kitchen that smelled like a French whore, I’d make some calls. I’m done with Glad.

I just looked out my window and saw a guy walking down the street wearing a yellow rain poncho. It’s not raining! If this is some kind of new fashion trend, I officially give up. People are nuts.

I think that may be it. My weekend was uneventful. I just watched the tragic news about the shuttle all day Saturday. I also saw Catch Me if You Can, I wasn’t impressed. It’s a great story but the film was just one note. That’s it!

Have a great day.

God Bless America.

Hello. I left my apartment twice this weekend: once to do laundry and once to go to the A & P. But I don’t want to talk about my weekend today.

Saturday I woke up to the horrible news about Columbia. I was speechless. I just sat in front of the TV all day. I feel bad for the crew and their families. I’m ashamed to admit that I had absolutely no idea there was a crew orbiting earth. I’m usually up on current events but this one fell under my radar. Launching people into space has become part of the routine, almost commonplace. Sadly, it took this accident for me to realize how wrong I’ve been. I’m not going to take these things for granted again.

I’m posting this very short diary Sunday afternoon. I’ll be back on Tuesday.

The best e-mail subject line I received yesterday was this: “Alert – Your ship just came in!” Ha, ha — well thank God! I didn’t realize my ship was out? — Stupid people, selling stupid things. Two things I’ll never understand, unsolicited phone calls and unsolicited mail. Does anyone do business that way? If I want something, I’ll call you!

And now for a new segment to BobBorden.com. I call it: BobBorden.com’s Worst Photo of the Week — here we go:

the Week
That was BobBorden.com’s Worst Photo of the Week – thank you, thank you very much.

I had an enjoyable evening last night. I got off the bus and walked into the toy store. How can you not have an enjoyable night at that point – am I right people?! Anyway, the only thing that sparked my interest was a George W. Bush doll. I thought it was pretty funny. But alas, I need to watch my money as I may go gambling this weekend. And I have to play the lotto tonight; it’s up to 77 million. You have to be in it to win it!After the toy store, I walked next door to the video store and played a game of Ms. Pac-Man. They raised the price to 50 cents! What the hell? I played one game and left. I got home, had some dinner and listened to music.

Weekend plans besides the aforementioned gambling you ask? None really — I may go for a walk. The temperature is on the rise in the east, I should get out there, meet people and do stuff.

Someone should tell the people that show movies on cable that “friggin'” is not a great substitute for the “F” word.

I’m going to end today’s diary with yet another new segment. I call it: BobBorden.com’s Message to Mom. Here we go: Mom, Lucas’ birthday gift has shipped and will definitely get there before his birthday. It’s coming to your house, so look out for it. That was BobBorden.com’s Message to Mom – thank you, thank you very much.

That’s it!

God Bless America.

Parting thought: People with dyslexia may think that today is Friday the 13th.

I was reading over a guy’s shoulder on the bus last night. The story seemed to be about how out of control our eating habits are, the big portions, the tasty food and how hard it is to lose weight. Sometimes I feel like I’m addicted to sugar. It’s just so pleasing to me to enjoy some ice cream or a candy bar. I have to cut this junk from my system. I’m stronger than my urges, right? The article reminded me that I need to do something about my situation, soon. I don’t want diabetes. I like reading over people’s shoulders, that’s how I learn, ha ha. Hey, all this talk about food reminds me about a new product I highly recommend:

on steak
Chef Paul Prudhomme’s Meat Magic — this stuff is really good. It gives a little zip to my meat. Just thought I’d mention that.

I played some video games and listened to music again last night. I’m enjoying getting out earlier this week. I feel like a normal Joe, working 9 to 5, punching the time clock and all that. It was in the 30’s yesterday, after weeks of it being in the teens, it felt like shorts weather. Very nice. I like thoseToyota Echo cars. They’re econo-boxes but the speedometer is in the center of the dash. I saw one driving into the tunnel. I like cars. I’m going to build my own someday. A nice little hot rod. Something to keep me busy while my wife is making my dinner and taking care of the kids, ha ha.

That’s it!

I leave you today with a new feature to BobBorden.com, I call it: BobBorden.com’s Community Calendar — here we go — Tomorrow is Friday. That’s all for
BobBorden.com’s Community Calendar.

God Bless America.

SIGH!!! On my walk home last night I just felt lost. I’m going on two solid weeks of thinking about my stupid car. I tend to over think things to the point where it drives me crazy. In a few days I expect to be found outside some building, beating my head against a wall. It should also be noted that sometimes I tend to over exaggerate things, ha ha. I’m going to wash my hands of this car; it’s just too old for me to put any more money into it. And I can’t keep buying used windows only to see the glass shards adorn my backseat like common trash.

car in Nutley
So, I’ll sell it, lay low for a while and then when they least expect it, I’ll be back on the scene with a brand new, slightly used Neon. That’s right, I said Neon.

In other news, I’m OK. I wore new shoes to work yesterday. I picked them up on sale from Kohl’s for $40 – now that’s a deal! They’re so damn comfortable! I haven’t had a pair of really good, cheap comfortable shoes in years. YEARS!

I have to end it here today – I need some time for me. Please understand that this is a rough time for BobBorden.com. See what I mean, over exaggerate.

Always,

Bob

I’m in a great mood right now. Let me tell you about the evening I had last night. First off, we’re not taping shows this week so we got out early yesterday. That’s good and bad – good for obvious reasons, bad because everyone else gets out at that time too. I didn’t let it get to me, I’m just not used to it.

I took the Path train home and walked by my friend Tiffany’s office. She just changed careers. Anyway, I called her on the cell and told her to look out her window – at that moment, I walked by, I hate to laugh at my own stupidity but I thought it was pretty funny.

From there, I walked to the record store. I bought Midnight Oil‘s greatest hits (used) for $4.99 — score! It’s sooooo good! Next, I walked to the cigar store to play the lotto; it was up to 66 million last night. If I said it once, I said it 100 times, You Have To Be In It To Win It! I ran into Tiffany walking home at that time and told her about the lottery, she played. Here’s what kind of a nice guy I am; I hope she wins.

The State of the Union Address was last night and what was I doing? Playing video games. If it helps any, I was playing a game that has a war tie in –anything? I’ll read the speech in the paper today. OK, I’ll have someone read it to me, ha ha.

tell your friends about
bobborden.com!
What else? I played a little air guitar, watched some tube and played some more video games. Life, at least last night, is good.

That’s it! Have a great day.

God Bless America.

In case you’re wondering, it’s still cold in the East. I was thinking about seeing a movie last night but decided to save my money. There’s nothing out that I care to see. I already saw Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, I enjoyed that and I heard conflicting things about the film About Schmidt. I’ll wait to see that on video. Instead, I watched some tube and played my new game. Life is good!

I let my beard grow over the weekend but couldn’t stand the itching. I fashioned myself a goatee yesterday morning. I call it weekend goatee.

over the weekend
It’s not much but it’s all mine. I’m going to shave it off, no need to sport a fashion trend that went out in ’95. Hey, I just had an unusual/fantastic idea! What would I look like with a half-goatee?

Another useless experiment

on the Internet
I look like a reject from Willy Wonka! Well, I do in person, it’s kind of hard to take a photo of a 4-day-old goatee. Seriously, when you woke up this morning did you have any idea you’d be seeing a half-goatee? Tell your friends about BobBorden.com!

That might be enough for today, let me check –

Yep, this is a keeper! Tune in tomorrow when I shave my eyebrows.

God Bless America.

I hope you had a very lovely weekend. My weekend started off on Friday night. I got home and enjoyed a lovely burrito for dinner. I can’t remember what I watched on TV, I really should start taking notes on my boring activities, ha ha.

Saturday, I woke up around 10. It felt great to sleep in so long. I kicked around the apartment and watched some car shows. I walked over to the laundry mat but it was out of service, odd. I was forced to regroup; I got in my car, drove to Jersey City and did my laundry over there. I haven’t been back there since I bleached all my clothes. I killed two birds with one stone, while my clothes were drying; I did my grocery shopping at the A & P. Excuse me for a second – YAWN!!!!!

OK, so I had a low-key weekend. They can’t all be winners.

Now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for, SUPER SUNDAY! I slept in until 11 – that’s some awesome sleep time! I enjoyed a breakfast of Frosted Flakes, watched some tube and then went for a walk. I was walking around Hoboken and I had an odd feeling. I haven’t gone for a walk in a long time. I enjoyed walking around Hoboken. I bought a $20 game for the GameCube. Smuggler’s Run – it’s very entertaining! I also bought a good old F & G bag for my vacuum. My old bag must have weighed 10 pounds, ha ha.

You say Super Bowl, I say Super Bore! Can I get a witness?! I wanted Oakland to win but they were simply outmatched. I had a lot of bets on the big game. I had $45 invested in the office pool and I had another $40 on the Internet. That’s a lot of money for yours truly but I wanted to celebrate my football awakening in style. My friend Walter found a website when you can bet on sports and he was kind enough to let me place a few bets on his account. And I’m very happy to report that I won $70! Now, if you’re good at figures you’ll notice that I’m down $15. That’s fine by me; I was lucky to get anything! Sports betting isn’t for me, there are just too many variables. I’m sticking with Blackjack, ha ha. I liked Sting but thought the commercials were below par.

I think that’s it for a Monday. We’re not taping shows this week – I may go see a movie tonight. OK, have a great Monday.

God Bless America.