Why is it so hot and humid? Last night there was a softball game between Late Show and The Daily Show. I was thinking about going but it was so damn hot! When I play, I PLAY and I was afraid they’d be taking me out on a stretcher. And we wouldn’t want that. This morning, I found out that we lost. Maybe if I played, we would have won. Why? WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not one message on my message board yesterday — is everyone on vacation? Sometimes the Internet is a lonely place.

So, instead of playing softball, I was going to ride my bike. I just couldn’t get it together. Where did my drive go? I have, have, have to go out tomorrow. I did see something interesting on the sidewalk:

Did you lose this boot?

One lone boot! I bet that boot had quite the story to tell. Do you ever look at people and try to figure out their stories? Sometimes you can look at a person and see that they’ve had a hard life. There’s just something to the lines on their face. Next time you’re stuck on the bus or in a waiting room, look around.

Curb your Enthusiasm was on last night. When work was work and everything just gets to be too much — That show can really make you feel good about yourself. It really shows us that people are jerks, it’s as simple as that.

I know I didn’t have much to say today but I have a feeling that nobody read yesterday’s diary. So, please read yesterday’s and let’s move forward together. I don’t know what I’m talking about. Remember the photo of the boot? Pretty cool, right? Right? I wish I could play a sound effect of a cricket right here. I saw this story on Yahoo! last night:

Snakehead Fish in 7 States, U.S. to Ban Them (Reuters) – The land-walking snakehead fish that is native to Asia has been found in seven U.S. states and the Bush administration will announce on Tuesday a ban on U.S. imports of the predatory fish. The snakehead, which can grow up to 3 feet long, eats other fish and can walk across land to find new sources of food in other lakes and streams. The fish can stay out of water for up to three days.

There’s a walking fish now

Here’s my commentary: What the hell is going on in the world?! If I ever see a walking fish, I’m going to shoot first and ask questions later! When exactly did it all start going to s**t?

Tune in tomorrow for an exciting new “contest.” That’s it! God Bless America.

Hello. Friday night, a huge thunderstorm passed by. I didn’t think I should have my TV or computer on. Faced with the proposition of reading a book, I decided to give myself a haircut. It’s short but I like it that way during the summer, low maintenance. That’s what I keep telling myself, it helps break up my crying spells. Why did I cut my own hair, WHY?! Stay tuned, later in this diary are photos of my new look. After that, I watched American Movie. I enjoy that film.

Saturday, I woke up and the world was at my fingertips! Should I go horseback riding at the club, golf a quick 18 to get the blood moving or should I go yachting on the river? I decided to go over to Walter and “Sally’s” place to play PS2 all afternoon. I’ve never played that system. I was really looking forward to playing baseball and just kicking back. I took the PATH train into the city. On my walk up I noticed all the traffic lights weren’t working.Odd, I thought — can’t wait to play some PS2! I get there and sure enough, no electricity. A transformer caught fire and messed up the power grid. 60,000 people were without electricity. And we were without a plan. We walked until we found electricity and ate some Thai food. Mmmmmmm. I’m not sure what I ordered but it was damn good. We went back to their place and played a non-electric game, cards.

Walter and Bob play Poker (Bob won)

Bob and “Sally”

I had a really good time but after five hours without air conditioning, a fan or even a nice breeze — it was time for Bobby to fly. Back to New Jersey where the electricity is plentiful.

Sunday, I woke up early, finished my laundry and shopping all by 1:00. While my clothes were drying, I went on a search for a place to wash my car. I just wanted to wash off one layer of bird crap. I got lost. It took me over 20 minutes to get back to the laundry mat. Damn. I think getting lost builds character. I hope so anyway, I get lost all the time! I’m 32 and I’m still getting lost! That ain’t right. Sunday night, I made myself a salad with chicken. Good eating!

That’s it! I leave you today with an unexplained photo of myself, enjoy. God Bless America.

Unexplained photo

Hello! I’m not sure where to start today? Good Lord is it humid out! I was in the subway last night and it felt like I was in a sauna — and that’s no joke. Too hot to sleep! Have you heard that Apple is coming out with a PC version of its ipod? After I save up my nickels and dimes, I may get one. A 5 gig player can hold 1000 songs. That’s not a typo, 1000 songs. They also have 10 and 20 gig versions but for more money, of course. No one on the PC side of things really picked up the ball and ran with it. All the PC jukeboxes seemed too bulky to be practical. They had a chance and they blew it. I can see a lot of PC people making the switch to Apple. I’m not including myself in that statement as I have no money.

You know what I like about my job? I’m sitting at my desk and Mike McIntee (Wahoo Gazette) rings up and says, “I’m not near a computer, can you look up who invented air conditioning?” Talk about your random requests! A few clicks here and a few clicks there and I had the answer: Willis Carrier was granted a patent (#808897) for the ‘Apparatus for Treating Air‘ in 1906. Willis Carrier is known as the “father of air conditioning.” I found that very interesting. It made me want to throw my Fedders air conditioner in the sewer!

It was the end of a long day yesterday and I’m walking out the door at work to go home. Someone propped the door open with a chair. I had to wrestle this chair out of the way and in the process, I ripped my shirt!

Bob rips shirt on door

OK, now I’m pissed! Who the &@#* put a chair in the middle of the door? I mean, look at this rip:

A close look at my ruined shirt

I’m angry, my shirt is ruined and look who’s coming around the corner:

Paula (formerly of Paula’s notes) propped

the door open with the chair and ruined
my shirt (Paula didn’t want her photo
taken for this story)

“No, I didn’t!” Was her response to my accusations. I said, “Yes, you did!” I think I have a pretty good argument. You can’t get black shirts like that these days. At least not in my size, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. That was a joke against myself. Damn. Anyway, Paula, you owe me a shirt or one hundred dollars for my pain and suffering, make that one hundred and fifty dollars.

That’s it! Like last weekend, I may put up an addition to my novel on Saturday. However, I think I’m going to hold off for a week to let it simmer. Have a great weekend. God Bless America.

First up today, I have to get a little house keeping out of the way. I’d like to wish a belated birthday to my friend Tom. Tom turned thirty-three or thirty-four yesterday — to be honest, we’re not really sure how old he is. I wanted to mention it because I have to share this photo of Tom taken in front of the White House:

Tom doing The Robot

in front of the White House

I thought that was pretty funny.

Note to the Government; BobBorden.com had absolutely nothing to do with that photo, personally, I thought it was a disgrace. Walter Kim is the photographer and I can get you any information on him at the drop of a hat. Just trying to do my part for a better America.

Something else was brought to my attention yesterday. Kellita, from my message board raised an interesting question about my boycott against Pepsi, she writes, “Isn’t Frito Lay a subsidiary of Pepsi?” After three minutes of exhaustive research, it turns out that yes, Frito Lay is a subsidiary of Pepsi. Pepsi bastardized footage from my favorite film (Easy Rider) and now they own Doritos?! Is this a conspiracy, am I losing my mind? Why is everybody out to get me?! I can’t even enjoy the sweet, sweet taste of my favorite snack food?! Have I gone insane!!!!!!!!?????????? AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Internet Acting, thank you, thank you very much.

Seriously, any company that makes Doritos is good in my book. I officially lift my boycott on Pepsi.

Turns out, Frito Lay is a subsidiary of

Pepsi — oops. The boycott is lifted!

Back in the day, I’d come home from a long day of flunking remedial math, sit down in front of the tube and pour me a big old bowl of Doritos. Sometimes, I’d even dip them in peanut butter. Was that combination good for me? No. Did it taste good? Hell yes! It was the 80′s, they didn’t know about health back then. But they did know about making great music, what up Motley Crue?!

OK, let’s review: You got a guy in front of the White House doing The Robot, you have the humiliation of me not knowing that Pepsi owns Frito Lay and you have a lovely recipe for Doritos and peanut butter. I’d say that’s enough for a Thursday.

Congratulations to Late Show this morning. We’re nominated for a whole slew of Emmy Awards. God Bless America.

Hello. Wednesday, Ah sweet Wednesday. I took the PATH train home last night instead of the bus. Every now and then I like to mix things up. I ran into an old aquaintance, Mike. He’s a good guy but I have to say,I’m not good with the conversation type stuff. I know how to talk but I never seem to have anything great to say. I want to be able to throw in lines like: “Yeah, just got the jet ski back from the shop” or, “I disagree, the Corvette handles much better than the Civic” or, “Yeah, come down to my beach house sometime.” At the very least, I have to come up with something better than, “That’s all I got.”

Big news, the folks at Frito Lay have done it again! I’m talking about Baked Doritos. This new addition was all the buzz at the deli last night. But how do they taste? Let’s go to the tape.

Bob tries Baked Doritos

Hmmmm, a little different, not as crispy but it has a pleasant after taste. Let me try another.

The verdict is in — Bob likes Baked Doritos

Man, that was some tasty stuff. I wonder if they’ll taste this good after 6 bags?

Bob eats 6 bags of Baked Doritos –

probably not such a good idea

I don’t feel so good.

I’ve been having fun today but honestly, my mind is elsewhere. My Aunt passed away yesterday and right now my thoughts and prayers are with her and the family. God bless you Aunt Vina.

That’s it for today. Horrible traffic on the way in, two days in a row! What can ya do? Have a good day. God Bless America.