I want one of those UN inspector trucks. Those things are sweet! Although the looks I’d get from people probably wouldn’t be worth it. Once again society is preventing me from doing something I want to do – Damn society!
It’s Thanksgiving Eve, if I can call it that. I hope everyone has a great one and I hope all your travels are safe. I’ll be here tomorrow. We work on Thanksgiving. I think this is my eighth Thanksgiving away from home. 7 or 8, something like that. We put the show on, a lovely meal is brought in and then we go home. It’s really kind of cool. I can stick my head out the window and watch the Macy’s Day Parade head down Broadway. The last few years, I drove my car in. I think I’m going to break tradition this year. I just have a vibe that’s telling me to take the subway.
I was really on the fence last night. I wasn’t sure if I should check out The Osbournes. They’re just so overexposed, if there is such a term anymore. I didn’t watch it. I decided to do a little self-introspection. OK, I played GameCube. I didn’t learn a lot about myself but I didn’t buy into the corporate Osbourne PR machine either. I’ll check it out this weekend; MTV repeats everything 100 times anyway.
That last paragraph was brought to you by one of my new characters, Redundant Bob. Personally, I think Redundant Bob is a jerk.
I saw a report yesterday on the number of websites out there that beg for money. I thought to myself, what kind of desperate people are out there? Let’s say I had a rich reader checking out BobBorden.com. I’d never, oh, say, ask for a Tivo – that’s so beneath me. Whatever happened to thegreat American work ethic?! OK, I’ve made my point — enough said.
I need a haircut. Just a trim, nothing major. But every time I go to SuperCuts and no matter how little I ask them to take off, they always take off the same amount. Hey, did you know that a Tivo can pause live TV? Huh. Anyway, back to my hair. So, I may just trim a little around my ears and call it a haircut. You can record like 60 hours with a Tivo. That’s cool. I’m getting to the stage where I have to tell the barber to cut around the bald spot. It’s not bald yet, just very, very thin. Fat, going bald and poor – that’s what I call the triple threat! Hello ladies. Screw it, somebody buy me a Tivo!
Whew, I went a long way for that one! The only saving grace is knowing that the whole world is probably on vacation today. No one’s reading this. I can say anything I want! I’m free, FREE!!!!!!!!! I want that new Honda Element. That looks like a cool little truck. They probably want you to pay for it with money. There’s the catch! 
OK, that’s it for me. I’ll be here on Thanksgiving. God Bless America.
I like Jazz.